Gaia question for the day

So I am part of the Gaia.com community and every day they ask a question. Todays question is "Why is it easy or difficult for you to trust?" I think essentially this is 2 questions. 1. I trust people easily on one level, but completely distrust them on another. I can tell people my deep dark secrets like they were weather reports, but when it comes to believing they don't talk about me behind my back, or that they truly mean what they say I find it almost impossible to trust people. I doubt everyone that I know. I think that they secretly don't like me, or they find me extremely annoying. 2. Now why do I think this is? Well I think it has a lot to do with my father being bipolar. I never truly knew what was going on his head. I walked around him like I was on eggshells. One wrong movement filled our house with storm clouds. I was never quite sure if today was a good day or a bad day. I think it also has to do with how often I've had friends leave me. I lost friends after 6th grade, after 7th grade, after 8th grade, after 10th grade and not one of them have felt sorry about it and not once did I see it coming. I thought everything was fine and then one day they have left completely. This left me alone and scared that every time I got close to someone they would just end up leaving. So yeah, I can tell pretty much anyone anything but I never really believe they'll stay in my life. I want to thank the people who have put up with this behavior and have tried to prove me wrong. Especially to Melissa. She knows how much I've had my doubts and she has proved me wrong every time. She is the best friend I could ask for. Thank you for proving me wrong.